The Waiting Game...

Silence.

It's one of the worst things to be met with. Answers provide direction and/or closure. You got the job. You didn't make the cut. Yes, I'll marry you. You have two weeks to live. Though not all of these outcomes are not ideal, at least you know what to expect. You don't have to replay every possible scenario in your head. You don't have to wait anymore.

Waiting

Sometimes [99% of the time] I feel like that is all I do. My plan and God's plan have not intersected an awful lot over the course of my life. I planned on graduating and getting married at 22. He planned on me being single and still in school. I planned on using my time wisely, helping people, working in an area that wasn't just a job but a way to reach people who were lost. He planned on me keeping the job I have and waiting for further instruction as the clock continued to click, never slowing; sometimes I think it sped up...

My job has been one of the biggest blessings in my life. I am not utilized like I want to be but I couldn't ask for a better situation or better bosses. Every time I need something, God uses it to provide for me. I also am not whining about God not answering my prayers. He does. I pray for guidane or a sign about photography and He will provide one. But I have to wonder, why in the world is it taking so long?!

I know given circumstances that I am currently in, He is working inside me and molding me (Ps 66:10: For you, O God, tested us; you refined us like silver). I am so very grateful for this. Though the situation may be painful, I know from past experience that He is using it to grow me and bring me closer to Him as He is the one I depend on for my strength.

All this being said, I am still waiting. I see these quotes that provoke action. I see my friends doing amazing things and seeing their dreams come to life. I am so envious of them. I want to see my dreams come true. I want to know which dreams are the ones He has placed on my heart so I can stop wondering which path I am suppose to take. Or when that path will ever be in front of me.

I long for the moment when I hear, "You know that thing you've been waiting for? Well, here it is! Sorry it took so long but you'll understand why soon enough." Oh, how glorious that moment will be! Until then, I'll trust in Him knowing that He only has my best intentions in mind and that He is always faithful and provides everything at just the right moment.

And until then... I'll wait.